A letter to my future beloved

Dear You,

How come I haven't met you yet? Or maybe I already did but I haven't realized it yet. I am so thrilled to see you. I am excited to share this overflowing love inside of me. But I figured we're not destined to be together yet. Maybe, I am not ready after all. Or maybe you're still in a relationship right now. Maybe you still have someone in your heart. Someone you cannot let go of. Even if we haven't met yet (or I haven't realized that I love you yet), I don't want you getting hurt. I don't want to know you're crying right now because of a broken heart. I want to make you smile. I want to embrace you and say, "Hey, I'm right here, it's okay, I love you and I will always will." I want to take away all your burdens and carry them myself. If you feel like giving up, I won't stop cheering you on. We would be the best partners-in-crime anyone would ever see. And I would expect you to do the same. I won't demand anything from you but love and understanding. Because you see, I am a complicated woman. I change my mind easily. I can be easily influenced by my surroundings. I am crazy. Sometimes I am loud and I would nag you and nag you and nag you but I can be also very very quiet and I won't dare make a sound. Please accept me like that with all your heart and soul. Love me and take me as I am. 

But whether I am naughty or nice, believe me when I say, I would always be loyal to you. I would take care of you when you're sick. I would run to nearest drugstore to buy you medicine. I would sing to you until you fall asleep. I would kiss you to melt all those bad feelings inside of you. I would do all this because I am truly, madly, deeply crazily, head-over-heels in love with you.

And yes, we would always be rejoicing in God's love. We would always go to church together. We would put Christ at the center of our relationship. It would be a three-way. And when we fight, we would always remember that Christ taught us not to harbor ill feelings towards each other. And that, our love is more important than our ego. I may ignore you, fight you, or hurt you but know that I just love you way too much that I hate us fighting. I would always pray to God for your success, your well-being and your family. I would pray to God just like every night that please if you're out there, wait for me. Wait for me until I am ready. Don't get married to someone else. Because I am yours to keep. I am fixing myself so that when it's the time for us to be together, I won't burden our relationship with my insecurities and personal issues. I pray to God that when we meet, you're ready too. We only have one shot at this. I won't mind taking that risk. I know when that time comes, there wouldn't be any doubts or confusion or hurt. I know when that time comes, I won't be afraid because you would be catching me when I fall.


Lots of love,

Patchi